My mum gave birth to me in 1992 followed by my 2 sisters in 1994 and 1997. My mum and dad didn’t get on, my dad used to cheat on my mum and hurt her so she turned to having a few drinks then she ended up been an alcoholic.
From the age of 5 I was getting up on a morning to find my mum past out on the sofa. I would empty the bottles and throw them in the bin then I would get my 2 sisters aged 3 and a few month old at the time and get them dressed and fed.
I helped my mum out as much as I could, I would do washing, cleaning and look after my little sisters. To my mum I was an adult, she spoke to me like an adult, she told me everything and I remember everything to this day that she told me and by this point my dad was never there.
One day my mum got arrested for drunk driving so we went to stay with our dad and his girlfriend (who was heavily pregnant with his kid) and my dad made me stand there and watch as they sexually abused my little sister and then they did it to me ( I was 5, my sister 3).
When my mum got out of jail we went back to live with her and I had told her what my dad had done. She phoned the police and social services got involved. They classed my mum as unfit to look after us as she was an alcoholic so my sisters and I got put in care.
My youngest sister got separated from me and my other sister. My youngest sister soon went up for adoption and was adopted in 1998. My sister and I were passed around foster homes as no one wanted two girls that had been abused and then one day we went to this foster family that we thought was great.
My mum would come and visit us every weekend at the home we loved it. I was severely depressed and just seeing my mum brightened me up. I was a kid in care, never once was it mentioned that I could be depressed, I was only 6 years old.
My mum started to go to AA the alcoholic group to stop drinking, it worked, we stayed at her house every weekend then one weekend 4th June 1998 we packed are bags because we was going to live back home for good. But when our social worker came in she looked upset so our foster carers and she took us into the living room where they told me and my sister that our mum had died.
Two months before my 6th birthday, my mother was dead. We went to see her in the morgue she was grey/white and very cold I put my hands over hers. Me and my sister gave her our favourite teddy bears and a picture of her, me and my 2 sisters to take with her.
I didn’t understand why she left us.
I didn’t understand why she wasn’t moving and she just laid there. Then it was time to go, I gave her a kiss on her lips and a cuddle and said “night night mummy ill see you soon.” I never did see my mum again.
I dint want to leave her there alone, my social worker had to peel me off her, all I did was cry.
The foster parents decided they wanted to adopt me and my sister, so in 2000 we were adopted and everything was going okish until I started my periods at 12 and a half years old in 2004. My adopted dad started doing stuff to me (sexually) and he made me do things back to him he told me not to tell any1 and I didn’t.
The only person I trusted and counted on had left me had died how could I tell anyone else. He told me that if I didn’t do as he wanted he would do it to my little sister so I let him carry on doing it to me. He did it to me until age of 15 and then one day at school I got pulled out of class by my head of year, my adopted dad had been sexually abusing my little sister and she had told the school.
I should have said something when he first started doing it because it wouldn’t have happened to my little sister then, but I still kept quiet. The police got involved and he was let go. I still kept quiet I was scared.
I sunk further and further into depression.
I then met this boy called Mark, he was 3 years older than me and the relationship was going fine we had been together 2 years in total. At the age of 16 I had moved out of my adopted mams and dads house and moved into a bedsit. After 3month of the relationship i fell pregnant he started hitting me and I lost the baby at 6weeks.
Two month later I found out I was pregnant again the same happened but at 9weeks. He was in the army and didn’t want any little brats as he called them. His violence got worse; I had fresh bruises each day at one point. I had a fat lip, 2 black eyes, bruises on my arms and legs, bald patches from where he had pulled my hair out and I had 1 side of my face that was black.
He rapped me on several occasions, but I was too scared to go to the police, he put knife to my throat. I wasn’t allowed to see my friends and had to do as he said (something I was used to by my adopted dad).
One day I was washing my hair in the sick when I felt hands near my face, he had put the plug into the pug hole. I tried lifting my head up, he was holding it down, I was panicking, he was trying to drown me.
My face was under water and I was holding my breath, then everything went black.
I finally came around and woke up and one of my mates was there, he had stopped Mark from killing me. Mark got sent to prison that day and that day I had escaped from him.
I started to drink and turned into an alcoholic just like my mum.
I was feeling down on my mums birthday(24th November) and one of my mates asked if her and her boyfriend could come up and have a drink so I said yes, not realising that the bloke who was with her was my sisters ex-boyfriend.
We were all talking and I went to the toilet and came back and drank my can of Carlsberg. I blacked out; as I came around I found my sisters ex on top of me, none of us wearing clothes.
I went numb and froze
I couldn’t move, he then stopped and stood up to my surprise my mate was sat there watching.
I asked her what had happened and she said we drugged you and ****** rapped you when you passed out while I sat here and played with myself and watched him do it.
We never spoke again after that.
I got with my current partner on the 3rd December 2008, we had been talking before that, he knew everything I had gone through and still wanted to get with me. We got together on that date and within 3 months I fell pregnant and after just a year of been together I gave birth to our gorgeous daughter on the 24th December 2009. We are now happily married nearly 4 years on.
I’ve had 13 miscarriages altogether but I’m blessed with my beautiful girl.
I still have down days about everything that has happened to me but I try and think positive. The things that I have wrote about me, make me the person i am today and I finally told the police about my foster dad abusing me as a child but they still didn’t do anything and I haven’t had a drink of alcohol for 2 and a half years
One thing my mum always wanted was her 3 girls and it got taken away from her, that’s why I don’t drink no more. I don’t want my daughter to have to go through what i went through as a kid. I don’t hate my mum for it. I love her and I thank her because she’s made me part of who I am today. I love you mum R.I.P.
This inspirational post was written anonymously by a mum who is a member of my Facebook mums group. I have full permission to share her story. If you can relate to this post and would like to share your own anonymous post please contact me.
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About The Real Supermum
Sick, sick ‘people’ all through your life
glad you got back on track for your daughter Xxx
Huge hugs hun your a very brave woman for speaking out xx
Dont know what to say to that hunni, so glad you have got a loving family now though. Big hugs x x
You are a very brave and inspirational woman. To come through the terrible things that have happened to you is amazing. Your Mum would be proud. Stay strong. Big hugs xxx
firstly a MASSIVE WELL DONE to you for turning your life round in a positive way. i am shocked by what you suffered and humbled to what you have over come. you should be very proud of yourself i am sure your mum, sister, husband and daughter all are xx
What a life you have had, so sorry about your mum =(
Don’t think about what you have been through, think about the future with your little lady instead and your other half instead xx
Big hugs to you hun..well done for sharing and I’m so sorry to hear about your mom and what you went through
glad you have your oh and baby girl now xx
Just awful hun. You should be proud of yourself. Enjoy every minute of your happy ever after.x
Really don’t know what to say except you are amazing to turn your life around and be do positive xx
Big hugs and a big well done for speaking out
My Best Friend Played With Herself As She Watched Me Being Raped http://t.co/o2wQQasm
what a sad story hun huge hugs for you you have been through soo much already so glad that you have now found happyness with you rpartner and you daughter wish you all the luck in the world you are so brave to speak out about all of this ive also been through a lot too and im the same age as you and know just how hard it is to speak out about things in the past and still hold something in with only my boyfriend knowing xx
hugs, such a sad story
x
OMFG am sat here crying, I just want to hug you and never let go. It angers me how kids can have a life like this, its sad and so unfair. Your mum didnt need you being taken away, she shud of had help and support and her kids. I too have been sexually abused tho no where near as bad a s you but I can relate to you hun, sendin massive hugs and love xxxxxxxx <3
Omg this story brought tears to my eyes! M’so sorry for what u have been threw but my lord what an amazing +& inspirational woman u r! Welldone u for stopping the drink for ur daughter I bet she’s so proud of u +& I bet ur mum is to babe! Rip to ur mum +& huge hugs to u being so strong to share ur story xx
This is a very powerful post babe ur mum wld b proud of u now
massive hugs. This is such a sad story. Glad youve got a loving family now though xx
This made me cry
so sorry wat yu had to go through hun and well done for writing this. Glad you are now happy and R..I.P to your mum. she will be looking down on you now at what you have now acheived with a beautiful daughter and married xxx
I’m in floods of tears reading this. I can’t even begin to imagine what you’ve been through. Well done for stopping the drinking, a true inspiration! X
so sorry for what you had to go through and your sisters. its so nice to hear you have moved on and not let any of these monsters ruin your life. r.i.p to your mum. massive hugs xxxx
(((((((((Virtual Hugz)))))))) you are such a brave inspirational lady the way you have turned your life around for your baby is amazing I wish you all the luck in the world x
had tears in my eyes reading this such a sad story. big hugs hun keep your head up and keep staying strong chick xxx
Oh my god! This story is shocking
( so sorry for what you went through, no one should have to go through that! Big hugs xx
Heartbreaking
such a brave ladyl xx
massive hugs to you x
massive hugs coming your way hun…. your so brave…. xxx
Omg thats awful hun, brought tears to my eyes , you’ve been through so much, your sooo brave <3 x
What nasty people you had in your life!! I’m glad things are better for you now!! I’m sure your mums watching over you and is proud of the lady you become xxx
Big hugs hun so brave x
I am so sorry for the loss of your mum, and I’m even more sorry to hear what you have been thru it must have been terrifing, you are a very strong and insperational woman I’m so glad you’ve finally found happiness & you have a beautiful baby girl, those men need locking up! Sick & twisted as is your ‘ex friend’.
Keep your chin up chick, you sound like you’ve finally found the happiness you need xxx
Oh my gosh how horrible for you very sorry about the loss of your mother , What a lovely ending you deserve the happiness you have found xxxxxxx
Such a sad story
your so brave for speaking out! There are some sick sick people in this world x
Well done for sharing your story. your so brave <3 huge hugs hun xx
Heartbreaking to read … There’s no words I can actually say … You are an amazing strong person to over come all of this bless your heart xxx
such an amazing and strong person for sharing your story x big hugs
I’m so close to tears reading this, and the only thing that is stopping them is the happy ending. You are such a brave and strong person, your past life ruled by evil, yet you are here telling your story with your amazing family by your side. I’m so sorry for the loss of your mum, but she would be so so very proud of what you are making of your life xx
im sorry 4 ur lil angels, you are a wonderful and strong women to overcome this as well as you have x
ursuch an amazing strong person and 100 times better thn these sickos hugs xx
Omg I’m so sorry
x
omg im soo sorry those sick people put u through that hun massive hugs
My heart breaks for you sweetie x
so sorry to read what you have been through but you are a very strong person to talk about it, massive hugs x
Massive hugs hun! glad you spoke out! All the best for the future xx
big ((hugs)) xx
What horrific time, I am so sorry about your mum, and so glad that you finally meet an amazing man and had a wonderful child together xxxxxx
im speechless right now as my heart has sunk….. i know the world is fucked up but wtf……… i wish i could have been there to help you at the time…
What a powerfull story, brought a tear to my eye
…happy you now have a loving family (just wanna give u a massive hug)!! Xxx
This made me cry the 1st time I read it and made me cry again! You are such a brave woman!! Big hugs to you xx
Wow, what an awful start to life for anyone to deal with big hugs hun xx
Wow! I couldn’t of coped with half of what you’ve been through. I’m so pleased you now have your own family! Seems like you’ve been abused and let down by everyone in your life x
after all that you are still standing! very brave! hugs hun x
Wow…I cannot stop the tears from flowing. I know words cannot ease the pain, but I am so sorry. I find it not a coincidence that your mother died the day you were to finally be with her. I cannot help but wonder if there ever an investigation since the sick forster-dad did what he did almost immediately after your mom’s passing. She is your guardian angel looking over you protecting you, her granddaughter, and her other babygirls. Keep going strong as you are a strong inspirational survivor.
so sad! ITs just awful, I hate reading these blogs, I can’t believe people do these horrific things!! You are very strong! and Inspirational! well done for moving on. xxx