I hate the Jobcentre with vengeance, yet again another letter to invite me to take part in a work focused interview. The whole interview thing is not a problem; I love nothing more than sitting there shaking, sweat drops dripping from my forehead and palms of my hands because I am so frightened to be there.
I do not mind at all that I have to share with a complete stranger how crap I feel about myself. Why I try to hide the real issues going on inside my head because I am too ashamed to tell this stranger what my life is really like.
This works adviser knows nothing at all about my mental illness so why do I have to be forced to answer her questions? I don’t want to tell her how I am coping; the fact is I am not because you have forced me to come here. I was doing OK till your letter arrived and them BANG you set it all off again.
She is always polite and nods, how can she even begin to understand why making me go to these interviews alone cause me so much stress that I don’t need. My CPN normally comes with me, but she’s now so busy I have not had an appointment for over 8 weeks now with her, if not longer. She won’t be able to take time off from her busy schedule to accompany me to the jobcentre.
I have asked if they can visit me at home, they can’t. They offer to pay for my traveling expenses but they can’t provide a babysitter for me can them? I feel more a freak having to ask a friend to give me a lift and come with me to the Jobcentre. I am too scared to go out alone.
Does the jobcentre know what’s it’s like for someone with a mental illness who fears so much of the world around them? No. They leave you sitting in the open and public waiting room where I feel sick and want to run. The voices appear telling me that everyone knows I am crazy and I feel every pair of eyes upon me.
Please don’t tell me your back to work interviews helps people; they leave me feeling even worse than what I already do.
“How are you”?
What do they want you to say? If you tell them even a third of the truth they look at you with a bizarre look on their face. Yes I am a freak, it’s written all over your face.
Do I tell her I have had to take 6 Tramadol pills just to give me the courage to go to the god damn interview in the first place?
Maybe I can go and do some new course? Maybe I should just top myself now should I as the thought of attending some weekly course, having to leave the house and go alone to sit in a room full of people is not something I can do? How much lower can they make you feel?
Yes I can say I am fit for work, yet how will a boss cope when I am there in real life? Please don’t tell me there are equal opportunities for mentally ill people, load of bollocks.
They assume because I look OK, I am OK. I am not OK I am dying slowly inside and people like them just keep on reminding me why I am so far away from being “normal”.
I would love to tell them to stick their interviews where the sun doesn’t shine, but I can’t afford too. I have to attend, forced against my will yet again. Days and weeks this simple appointment will set me back. I will lose a few nights sleep the run up to it, the fear will set in that I have to get on a bus alone. Will my friend turn up to take me? Will I have to sit in the waiting room long?
When did I last see my mental health worker? Why don’t you give her a ring and ask why she is far too busy to see me. Why they are never there when you need them?
What medications do I take; please tell me you’re joking? My shrink is trying to poison me.
Perhaps you can help me with my Tramadol addiction while I am here, do you offer courses for that?
Why not give me bloody something constructive to do, than sit there with a look of self-pity on your face. I am not like you, I am not able to go out to work 9-5 every day and that does not make me a bad person does it?
I would change days with you anytime. It looks so cosy sitting at your nice organised desk. Why don’t you try sitting where I am for the day and you might learn a few things, like how not to conduct a back to work focus interview with someone like me.
About The Real Supermum
The Job Centre & Back To Work Interviews For The Mentally Ill Rant http://t.co/5xivKlK4 Pls Rt
They have no idea hun i jus got mine thro 2 and am dreadin it x
The Job Centre & Back To Work Interviews For The Mentally Ill Rant http://t.co/jlVNIZHt irony is that ATOS assess unfit 4 work 4employers
totally agree with u! they should have done a home visit for u. everytime i have been ive been made to feel awful.
The Job Centre & Back To Work Interviews For The Mentally Ill Rant http://t.co/7tOZoIwv
absolutely agree with you as my mum is the same, although her illness differs from yours she also has severe anxiety and these interviews are like torture for her x
Why is the Job Centre allowed to make us feel this way? http://t.co/7tOZoIwv #depression #mentalhealth
Hugs hun, can’t imagine what you’re going through! X
agree with you they should do home visits for you.. i used to dread going to them aswel xx
“@spiritwriter66: The Job Centre & Back To Work Interviews For The Mentally Ill Rant http://t.co/cB2CPrKJ” well said!
This is v important.This will be me soon RT @twowolves: The Job Centre & Back To Work Interviews For The Mentally Ill http://t.co/8W904YSp
Have they suggested you apply for ESA? Can you get your doctor to give you fit notes to confirm you are Ill? If so, you should be on ESA & wouldn’t have to attend the Jobcentre.
Have suffered a & d most of my life, am ok now but know the horrible feeling that comes with having to justify yourself to people who have no idea.
Yes I get ESA hun already ;(
i dont know whether its different for different areas or if this is the same as a medical, but after speaking to my GP and CPN they rang up the esa people and point blank told them they had to do a visit at the surgery with my doctor and cpn present. This was due to the fact two months later they had threatened to sanction me if I didnt some how attend an appointment for a medical whilst I was in hospital. Two days later I got a phone call from the job centre saying based on some sort of information they have reviewed my claim will continue for another 12 months with out any interviews or medicals.
thanks for that something I will ask about as shitting myself
The Job Centre & Back To Work Interviews For The Mentally Ill Rant http://t.co/OpHs2nuq
Unless they are a qualified mental health worker how can they pass judgment on if your able to work
I agree with Sarah ^^ unless they’re someone who is a qualified mental health worker who the hell are they to pass judgement! they have no idea
@FollowBDT I wrote about my own fear with the Job Centre yesterday, I hope it helps others http://t.co/7tOZoIwv
The jobcentre are really clueless when it comes to issues like these x x
If you look normal then you must be normal! God help us but these people in these jobs need training in spotting a person who has a severe anxiety disorder. Makes me so mad.
Bless you…I just had to go to the doctors to get a note for the appeal…it was distressing and even with my notes and some background into the stresses of physical ill health old and current stress and trauma I was questioned as if I am not trying hard enough and given just a month till my next note is due…I was in hospital when they declared me fit for work…I find this whole system becoming more and more abusive and worse than dealing with the aftermath of rape which I have made peace with pretty much now…sorry…my heart goes out to all who suffer needlessly by this system that beats us up for now being able to be well physically, mentally and emotionally while the lack of support is also damaging….bless you x
I personally think mental and physical health interviews need to be separated. You can see if someone’s got a dodgy leg, but you can’t see when someone is ill. I suffer with bipolar 1 and am on full blown medication. I now have a successful career, but when I was on ESA I had to do these back to work interviews. Problem being bipolar though is that one minute I wanted to die, next minute I felt like I was invincible! So the days I was invincible, I would lie and everyone would think I was fine. The days I wanted to die, I couldn’t even get out of bed to attend, so would have my benefits stopped. That would lead to more manic behaviour, stealing, then massive depression. It’s never ending. However, I do understand why they don’t do home visits – the idea is to MAKE you get out of the house, which is right. You can’t just hide away with the same excuses, you have to make an effort to get better. If you don’t want to get better, then you shouldn’t be on the benefits. But I do think that they could have them in a more secure setting/location away from the home. It’s a middle ground, and one I think they should invest in. But anyways – I hope that you find the strength like I did, one day, to get better. And I think the other lady is right – you should write!
so don’t be agoraphobic then as that is the same old excuse?
some people cant help what illness’s they have. i think they should make a appointment and come and see you at home instead of making u got there cause that way u wont be as anxious and u will be in comfort of ur own home xxx hugs emma xxxxx
@therealsupermum, when I read your posts I wonder how you get thru each day, then I remember that you have so many friend that you can turn to and open up to, is your job centre for real xxxxx
I agree 100% with wot u have said
Huge hugs x
Completely agree!x
Wow i dnt have mental health issues bt i understand what your saying they havnt a clue have they hope ur ok x
I cannot believe I found your post. I have almost the exact same problem and felt exactly the same as you at the Job Centre interview. The JC interview was (I didn’t know at the time) the easiest part of the whole esa WRAG process, I was then told I had to attend monthly interviews at a private job centre place; oh boy was that a bad experience! The room was full of out-of-work under 18′s all shouting and treating the place as a social club. Nothing was private and I was expected to mix in with these people that enjoy being out of work! I was screaming internally, having a panic attack and just wanted to run – it was awful! All I kept saying to the Receptionist is that ‘I had a good job’, ‘I kept it for as long as I could before my employer decided that I wasn’t fit for the job and started to terminate my contract’! I am ten times more worse than then, what makes these people think I can just turn up at a job centre and find a job???!!! I agree that fakers need to be found out and stopped from receiving benefits, but what about those of us that are really ill and treated this poorly – the thought of going to that place again makes me physically sick, but I need the benefit so have to go. I wish there was an alternative, or somewhere to complain. I too feel like ending my life would be easier than attending these appointments with condescending advisors who know nothing of my illness.
Huge hugs Hun, its not fair at all xx