The naughty step is a great way to teach your child who is boss, that they should listen to what you say and respond to your requests. They can not hit, bite, head but you or draw all over your walls with crayon. They need to learn these rules and the naughty step is a valuable tool.
BUT… I hear many mums say this just does not work.
My argument is that if its not working then your not doing it right. The naughty step technique is not an easy one to master, I find it to be the most draining. You have to follow through with the warning you give and this is where most mums go wrong, they don’t.
Stop making the rules up as you go alone, devise a plan and stick to it, write down what rules you expect to be followed. Consistency is the key to making the naughty step work for you.
If you give your child a warning that they will go to the naughty step if they do that again, when they do it again you must be quick to react. Do not ignore it because your busy doing something, you have to stop what your doing and take your child to the naughty step. Even when you are away from the home you can still use the naughty step technique.
The idea of the naughty step is to remove your child from the situation, to give them time to reflect and learn and of course calm down. The naughty step doesn’t even have to be a step, it can be a mat or an area of the home, but this mat, step or area has to be used each time. Don’t allow your child to take a toy or a book with them.
When they move, go back and replace them there, yes this can mean doing it 50 times in half an hour, you do it no matter how tiring you are.
I hear many mums getting angry at their children because they wont stay on the naughty step, its your job as mum to remain calm and make them stay there, by teaching them that no matter how much they scream your not going to react and no matter how many times they move, your only going to place them right back there, so they soon learn to stay put.
Instead of complaining that the naughty step does not work, make sure your doing it right first.
About The Real Supermum
Been there done that…. I believe yes loads of kids do respond to this and if they do that’s great and ur on ur way to a winner. Bit the amount of time I have spent doing this “one warning then action” it took over my life. Not kidding 5 hours of back to the step off again back to the step of again then when she finally did her time we had our chat kiss and cuddle then she was straight back doing the exact same thing she was put there for… I praise her when good make a big fuss when she listerns play talk entertain laugh kiss Cuddles I do all this with her and yet she still plays up…. I havnt just tried this once or twice I have done it plenty of times all the time it takes hrs for her to stay she doesn’t “reflect” on what she has done she is 3 she laughs because she thinks its a game me and partner have stopped feeding our little boy to do this on her but she laughs all the time…. I am firm and make my warnings clear with no messing around and I do stick to them but like I said I have a little madame who thinks its funny and enjoys it and after does she time goes back and does the same thing so to her the game starts again. I havnt giving up and I’m still doing it a year later and still no change… And yes I am going to say it doesn’t work for my child and yes iv made sure I’m doing it right.
We have started using a “a naughty blanket” that way I can take it wherever we go x
I seriously need to start using the naughty step!! I have 1 ‘teenage’ toddler who has 1 huge attitude LOL!
I haven’t used the naughty step yet as my son is too young to understand at present time. I however do teach swimming and have several children that play up every lesson. I give them a warning regarding their behaviour (I tell the child if they carry on I will sit them on the side for a minute) I carry it through and afterwards the child normally behaves because they don’t enjoy watching the others have fun.
Ive already got a naughty chair for my nearly 1 year old and she knows exactly what is happening! The Sky box, TV and DVD player have recently become the best buttons in the world to press and I simply dont want her thinking that she can play with them at home and at everyone elses house we visit. If she touches them and I tell her she’s a naughty girl and it is not her toy to play with and if she does it again she will go on her naughty chair and I point to the chair. I then move her away and make sure she is engaged in play before walking away. Sometimes thats enough, and others she’s straight back to the Sky / DVD / TV with her pokey little finger! I pick her up tell her she’s a naughty girl and put her on her chair facing the corner for 1 minute. First time I did this she was off it like a rocket and I had to put her back a good dozen times. She still screams murder now but she doesnt move, I sit close by but dont look directly at her, then I pick her up and tell her again that the Sky / DVD / TV are not her toys and if she touches them again she will have to go back on the naughty chair. We then use the baby sign for sorry, have a kiss and a cuddle and off we go to play … I’d say it’s working for us as we’re down to using the naughty chair for this every few days now rather than every few hours. Either that or the Sky / DVD / TV just aren’t as interesting to her now lol.
I don’t use the naughty step often, I think so far only twice and it’s very difficult to execute properly – can’t get to the part of recognizing mistake.. lol stubborn gal I have!
why is it that if it doesnt work for our child it means wer doing it wrong????????? my 8 and 6 year old understand it, i dont have to constantly put them back they sit there for 8 or 6 mins depending which one is on it but will always go and do exactly what they did before to get put on there and end up spending probably half the day in total on the stairs! so please tell me what am i doing wrong if im following the steps with the warnings and the explaining why theyre there and the kiss n cuddle at the end n theyre there for the right time, its not that im doing it wrong its that its a form of punishment for my children that doesnt work, my 3 year old however is the opposite his a nightmare to keep on there i have to constantly put him back but when he finally does sit for the full 3 mins he will come of when told he will give me a kiss and a hug and will start behaving for a while it works better for him, the naughty step isnt for everyone it doesnt work for every child and any parent that will sit and say if it doesnt work for your child then your not doing it right is totally wrong because as a parent you should know every child is different and what works for one may not for another!
Do you agree with the terminology NAUGHTY STEP? Well according to Childrens Psychologists it demoralising children, and as parents we should pick a better name for the location where we put our children when they are misbehaving.
Interesting thinking …
This is an interesting post because you see programmes such as “supernanny” endorsing this technique and I have a friend with a very naughty little boy who seems to get away with murder.
Being forced to do nothing but reflect on their bad behaviour seems to be quite a powerful technique, but, not an easy one.
Im sorry but this is not the cure all for all naughty behavure, my 2 year old will lash out snatch something hit or gerenaly be a brat by the time I get from the kitchen to the lounge he has put himself on the naughty spot and is shouting sorry?! I think there are other methods of your child learning to behave than this
we have the naughty rug, my lo took to it very well, i think the key is consistency xxx
my sons too young too use this technique but i will be giving it a try, if it fails il move onto something else
xx
I’ve started using a naughty pillow takes time but it is starting to work for me xx
OMG that naughty blanket seems like a good idea Lisa! Xx
the naughty chair works 4 my eldest but not my youngest we find sitting him in the dining room works alot better xx