This is hard for me to write but it’s something I want to share. It was the 12th of February 2011, I was 3 days overdue, I had a feeling I was going into labour back ache couldn’t settle ( my adopted mum who have now fell out with ad gone out but decided not to drink as she knew I was going into labour).
At 4am I had my first contraction so took paracetamol & hopped in the bath, they didn’t stop every 3 minutes lasting 30 seconds but somehow I managed to get a good night’s sleep and woke again at 11:am still having contractions. I went by my normal day painful yes but I could manage it.
At 1am Sunday morning they got bad but still manageable I had been in labour 24hours lasting every 3 minutes, how I managed I don’t know. I went to the hospital where I was told I was 1.5cm dilated and to go home & rest. Yeah right was she the one in pain no. She said to go back 6pm that night.
All through the day constant contractions every 3 minutes so I had tea & went hospital where I was told I was only 1cm, now they gave me stronger pain killers and sleeping tablets and to go home well 20 minutes later at home the tablets had all worn off and the pain was like no other. Back I went where they put me on a ward with a shot of pethidine.
They left me there in a room on my own at 17 ( my partner was not allowed with me due to it being late at night) I kept asking for pain relief, they were now every 2 minutes and lasting a minute, the next I remember it was 12pm on Monday and I was in the bath.
It didn’t help and I was screaming in pain, they just left me, in fact the cleaner was much more helpful than the midwife’s, she sat with me chatting to me and telling me how to ease the pain (my son was back to back) they then gave me gas and air on the ward and I don’t remember much until 11am Tuesday morning, having been in labour 3 days now.
I missed my partner and was scared after shouting and screaming at the midwife she finally examined me to find I was 5cm, so I rang my partner and was transferred to delivery. After this I don’t remember much although one thing that seems to stick on my head is saying I needed to pee and sitting on the toilet for what felt like minutes but according to my partner I had been in there 30 minutes.
All I know is I was stuck on monitors, had a trainee midwife, was refused an epidural even though it was a good time to do it and they then tried to move me, big mistake, I couldn’t physically move, then it went downhill. She broke my waters and they were black, my baby had had a poo, I know it’s dangerous but she didn’t seem bothered by it.
Then I started to lose consciousness and my baby’s heart beat dropped to 24bpm and with every contraction my body rejected my son and tried to push him out he was dying inside me. I had a lady come in put a cannula in and spoke to me about a C-section although now i don’t remember this. Then all of a sudden she hit this button and loads of people started to flood in.
Next thing I know I am in theatre being pinned down to the table and put to sleep (back in the room my partner was being told he may lose me & the baby or at least one of us). I then woke up covered in wires and feeling empty and I remember saying to the nurse observing me in recovery “Am I a mummy or is my baby an angel?” it had taken me 4hours to come round. I then had to wait 30 minutes to see my baby.
THE AFTER CARE
Shortly after my partner left visiting time was over they told me off for not having pain relief. I felt no pain at all surprisingly, I couldn’t move, I had a catheter in so I kept asking to hold my son to breast feed and they told me off for that too. I asked them to change him; she said she would so as he had settled I fell asleep.
Next morning I woke up and my bed was full of blood (they had put a pad on but left my knickers off and it had gone everywhere) it was 7am. I asked the lady to help me with my pants and she said I didn’t need them as I was going for a shower shortly. They then removed my cannula and I bled out of my hand all over the sheets.
I couldn’t hold my baby as my bed was covered in wee (my catheter hadn’t been changed and was leaking all over the bed) soaked in blood and I was crying. My partner turned up and went mad, there I sat at 11am still in all the blood and piss and to top it off my son had been in the same shitty nappy for 10 hours, they hadn’t changed him.
I went for a shower after demanding and I self-discharged myself, I felt happier at home than at the hospital. I don’t feel I was giving any care at all. I was neglected, it was 4 days of horror and I will never give birth again, I am too scared now. They packed me off with 7 injections 1 for each day to thin my blood and some stockings and that was that. Thankfully back home I received amazing care from my partner.
Stuart James; born 15th of February 2011, weighing 8lb 6.5; that is my birth story. I still get very upset and have flash back but I feel there is nothing I can do.



oh hunni im sorry you had a truly awful experience, im glad you and your son are ok now
I hope you put a complaint in xx
omg how awful that must have been for you!! Childbirth should be special and they made no effort to make it that way for you
glad you are both ok xx
That’s bloody awful! File a complaint hun they have no reason to treat you like that what so ever .. you and your son are human beings NOT pieces of meat! x
thank you for the replies
i’m unable to file a complaint as i self discharged and it’s been over a year x
That is disgusting how they treated you hun! giving birth is supposed to be an experience not a nightmare. I’m glad your ok and so is your LO. xx
omg thats is disgusting, i hope u put a complaint is as the care u was given was disgraceful
big hugs hunni xx
omg hun what a bad experience you had :O its shocking how they treated u made me cry about saying when the heartbeat dropped
id still try to make a complaint and say u only discharged cause of the shite treatment you were receiving, dont be put off any more babies its not all like that hun xx
I cannot believe that. You become a midwife to help people, why choose a job path you cant be bothered with! Well done to you both for recovering well xx
omfg thats disgusting hun yu shuld of put a complaint in xxx
wow, brought a tear to my eye reading your story and yeah totally understand why it was hard for you to write that but well done for doing it and sharing it with us all. yes it was horrible and its disgusting that you get treated like that in hospitals. then they wonder why the hospitals have bad names…duh!!!
oh huni how aweful
not all hospitals are like this where i had my 3rd was terrible with after care and im now on my 4th at a diff hosp and have found out many from where i had my 3rd are requesting to go where im having my 4th have u thought maybe a bit of councelling to help you get past what happened x
Oh my god that is discusting hope a complaint was made x
how awful! even if you cant make an official complaint you could have written to the midwife in charge but i guess whats done is done and there is nothing you can do to change it now …..you shouldnt let one experience shape your life it would be different next time x
what a horrible experiance.
though i know what its like with my 1st ellie they told me i wasnt in labour wudnt check mecos they sed i cudnt of changed tht much in an hr they gave me sleeping tablets and ignored the fact i was screaming in my sleep iwoke up to me pushing her head out they rushed me to labour ward saying wunder if she will give birth in thelift.
Thats disgusting. i can understand why you wouldn’t want to have anymore children but each hospital isn’t the same, I have had my 2 children in different hospitals and they were completely different. the first i only saw someone when i called them, the second had a midwife lead ward and was brilliant. Maybe talking to someone might help and make you options a bit more open to having more if you wanted. x
So sorry you went through all that! Big hugs to you x
Omg what a horrific time you had..so nice to hear it was happy ending also..you can also make a formal complaint to the hospital xxx
oh horrible I hope you made a compliant xxxxx