In a relationship, we’re all too often concerned about what the other person is thinking and feeling. We want to make sure they don’t lose interest or develop feelings for someone else. Basically, we want to make it impossible for their feelings to change. But what about our own feelings? Sometimes, no matter how hard we try, our feelings might change, for the good…or for the bad. If you aren’t feeling the same about your partner as you have in the past, it can be a scary thing, and you might not know if you should work through it or pack your bags.
Here’s what to do if your feelings change.
Before you make any rushed decisions, think about how the rest of your life is going right now. Often, when we’re stressed, we fixate on something other than the real problem to avoid dealing with it. If all of a sudden your partner annoys you all day long, are you sure it’s really him? Are there other things in your life that might be causing you to be on such an edge? Sometimes, the problem starts with you. If you’ve taken stock of your life and everything is flowing along nicely, it’s time to consider your relationship and break it down, to see if you can pinpoint where the issue might be. Have you and your partner been arguing a lot? Are there core values that you differ on? When it comes to the future, do you want different things? Even if you’ve discussed all these things before, resentment can build without you even really being aware of it, until one day, you wake up completely unattached to the person you’ve loved for so long. Rather than throw a relationship away, take the time to fix your problems and issues as a couple. This requires a heavy dose of communication that isn’t easy, nor will it be fun…but it’s worth it.
Unfortunately, feelings can change without any reasoning behind them. When this happens, it’s difficult to be honest because your partner is going to want to know why. Many times, women say that their feelings change, when in reality, they’ve always known that the relationship wasn’t right, but they just weren’t strong enough to end it sooner. It’s not as if one day you love the person and the next you can’t stand them, at least not usually. Sometimes our feelings can be tricky though, and fleeting. Sure, you might feel different about your partner one day, but is it worth throwing away a relationship based on a feeling…or lack of it? For some, the answer is absolutely yes. For others, it’s not. The best thing to do is be honest with your partner and give them a chance to fix the problem rather than blindsiding them with a declaration that you just don’t love them anymore.
Relationships are work, and it’s not always going to be sunshine and rainbows, there are going to be days when you can’t stand the other person or wonder why you’re in the relationship at all. But this isn’t the time to give up, it’s the time to try harder to make your love work…if it’s worth it to you, of course.
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Very true! There are reasons why you fell in love with that person at the start..so surely it’s worth the effort to see if you can reconnect with those reasons. Me and my partner have had 6 happy years so far & I’m sure there are many more wonderful memories to be had. xx
You should definitely work at a relationship. I gave my Husband the chance to help make our marriage work but a year later it was still the same so I made the hard decision to end the marriage. Although I loved him, I wasn’t in love with him anymore. It was best decision iv ever made. We rushed into getting married far too quickly. Xx
Very true! I thin u should definatly work at a relationship as there’s a reason why u fell in love in the 1st place x
I think you should work on a relationship. If me n andy gave up at the first hurdle we would of been over long ago. But we didnt. And i am very glad x
all relationships need work but when you know it’s over it’s over
I feel like sometimes I’ve fallen out of love as I have gone through alot with my bf n his never really mad it better x
No relationship is perfect, if you don’t work at it it will fall apart x
If you give up at the first hurdle, at the first hiccup you will never get far with anything in life. Work at it. Try to work out what’s ‘gone wrong’ and try to work it out. It may be something simple. It may just be bad communication / lack of communication. Having kids puts a strain on any solid relationship, it’s challenging and you have to make time for the 2 of you again x
very true this post n it has very good adives 4 anyone having this problem xx
Very good and true post xx
all relationships need to be worked on to last but i also feel that you will know when its over and then there is no going back xxx
Excellent article! The point on evaluating all aspects of your life to determine if in fact your S/O is actually the problem is classic, priceless advice! And yes, if a behavior or actions needs changing, speak up about it calmly and respectfully. Communication is the KEY to success. If your partner makes no effort to correct, it suggest a lack of respect,