I lowered my head to the floor so I did not have to make eye contact with the nursery teacher when I explained to her for the first time that my children had never ran or played on concrete before.
credit
My heart had dropped to the pit of my stomach when they started their first day at nursery, they had an amazing outdoor play area, with play houses and sand pits and bikes, I knew my kids would just love it, but the playground was concrete.
The teacher I am sure did not look at me strangely, but then again I suppose anyone would hearing such a thing. That is correct, if out and about my kids have to hold my hand, never could they run on concrete, they may fall over.
My mind does not work like the normal mind, it works in some unusual and bizarre ways at times, well most of the time if truth be known.
I have extreme anxiety issues, mainly to do with my traumatic past and the psychosis I regularly suffer. One of the main areas this effects me is in the safety of myself and of my children.
If my children were to run, they would fall, if they fell they would become hurt. To a normal mind that is normally what happens in the first few years of life, they fall and learn to get back up again, with the help of a cuddle and a plaster, in my world, just the fear of them falling, that fall to the ground turns my world upside down.
They can run on grass as that has a soft landing I have reasoned with myself, that is where I am happier allowing the children to run, be it my 2 year old or 13 year old.
Extreme anxiety has ruined and controlled my life for many many years now. I am on medication, a new one I have just been prescribed and I hope it works, I have been told in 21 days I will start to see some positive effects.
Have you ever suffered from extreme anxiety? Would you feel strong enough sharing your experience here on the blog in the hope of helping others understand this or to see they are not suffering alone? If so why not submit your own experience, you can remain anonymous. You can email me here emma@therealsupermumblog.com
About The Real Supermum
I really hope u feel better soon! But to me, the grass is just as bad, on the concrete u can say any dangers; glass, lit fag ends etc my little boy only walks, holding my hand on concrete yet still has the odd trip or fall but has never been hurt, one day at the park he was runnin on the grass, tripped and had a bloody knee so to me the grass is just as dangerous
Hugs hun.. I suffer anxiety and real bad panic attacks I’m am ashamed to say that I can’t take my kids out on my own I have to have some1 with me I can’t go out on my own full stop. I can be in my home and I have a major anxiety attack then followed by a major panic attack to the point I feel like my life is being taken from me… I find it hard to shop as I can’t think so I get myself confused and run out the shop in tears. I’m on pills that are not working with me so back round the gp for me xx
I used to suffer anxiety terribly now its just every so often it flares up
the GP sent me to a special counsellor and my work to a private counsellor
I was given anti depressants but refused them
that was 2006 – 6 years later and im in control now
That’s got to be pretty tough to deal with… My son has gross motor delay and he’s stereo blind so he’s always falling over… Every time he falls it makes me cry so much because I know he’s hurting. His forehead is a mass of sores and scars because he aint got that part in him to put his hands out when he falls… It’s tough but you learn to cope with it…
I think with you it’s obviously more of a psychological problem, you’ve just got to understand if your kids do fall, which they all will… They just got to go through it… It’s a part of normal childhood life. I know it’s easy for me to say as I don’t understand what it is that gives you that fear and anxiety. I hope that with time it will get easier for you to cope. X
Must b so hard hunni…. I have anxiety problems due to my ex partner hope u over come this with your new tablets x
Oh, I really hope you notice a difference in 21 days. I worry excessively about my kids too and I wonder where the line is between ‘normal’ worry and excessive anxiety. I have started writing a blog post on it but haven’t had the courage to post it yet.
When my son started nursery I told the teacher he could only eat apple if it was peeled (I have a thing about choking) and she looked at me like I was mad.
I always remember a quote I once read that said ‘fear is the price of love.’ For me, I think that sums up being a mummy.
I haven’t had such anxiety experience; but I am quite particular about what my girl touches as she always put her fingers in her mouth. Having eczema, means her fingers scratches everywhere on her body too. Always have lots of baby wipes and tissue in my baby bag.
<3 x x x
I hope there is a diffrence while taking the new meds
xx hugs xxx
Very brave of you speaking out to aid others to find help, you are an inspiration to us all x
It does make sense though… Who on earth thought “ooh, i know — children & concrete match made in heaven!!” the only upside I can see is that they will only eat stones, not grass or dirt!!
I was nervous when Kai first started walking about letting him play in my mums garden … He’s forever tripping up but it doesn’t bother him one bit he just gets up and carries on like a loon ! X
I think any floor it’s as bad as each other on concrete Ivan see what’s on the floor bit in grass u can’t x
hope you find some way of coping